Today we learn that no one who is against gay people or, possibly, for racism makes a lick of sense.

Guy #1: He was down here talking about how gay people shouldn’t be allowed to adopt a baby and then he started to say he didn’t think black people and white people should have babies together.
Guy #2: Well, maybe that would confuse the kid.
Guy #1: What? Black and white people?
Guy #2: Naw, gay people.
Guy #1: Yeah, it probably would but at least someone would like havin’ the kid around.
Guy #2: I just don’t know about that kinda thing, I just think it’s wrong.
Guy #1: I do too, but still at least the kid would have someone to look after them. I don’t think it’s right and I don’t even like that the gay guys I know are puffin’ peters but if I died I’d give ‘em my kid before he went to a home.
Guy #2: I dunno about that, wrong is wrong.
Guy #1: Well that’s what he said about black and white people, you sound just like Ned.
Guy #2: Naw, I don’t care if black and white people fuck.
Guy #1: Well he said ‘you don’t see a squirrel fuckin’ a rabbit or a monkey fuckin’ a dog so why is that right?’
Guy #2: That don’t make no sense, they ain’t people.
Guy #1: That’s what I said, blacks and whites is people, but monkeys and rabbits and shit aren’t the same.
Guy #2: Was he talkin’ about gays then?
Guy #1: I dunno, gays are people.
Guy #2 (laughs incredulously)
Guy #1: I don’t know what he was talking about, but it sounded shitty to me.
Guy #3: Well why don’t you see a squirrel fuckin’ a rabbit? If I was a horny squirrel out there in the woods I’d be nailin’ all the rabbit pussy I could!
Guy #2: Cause animals ain’t got the spirit of evilness in them.
Guy #3: Well they better not bring me back as no horny ass squirrel or you’re gonna see a bunch of squabbits runnin’ around everywhere because I don’t care what color it is long as there’s pussy involved!

Then guy #3 laughs, gets up and leaves the room.

I’m not usually too proud of the guys I work with but today I got a little swelling of pride from this, I am walking through to the bathroom when:

Guy #1 (shouting-ish): I am tellin’ you right now, it’s hard to get by as a white man at these companies, they just keep hiring all those colored fellas and Mexicans!

Guy #2: What fellas? What are you even talking about? There’s two black guys and I ain’t seen nary (Yes, he used nary, one of my favorite words - Editor) a Mexican guy around here ever.

Guy #1: You know what I’m talkin’ about, they are all over the place and pretty soon we ain’t gonna have jobs because of those people.

Guy #2: Aw, bullshit, I hear you every single day comin’ in here talkin’ this and that about people ain’t like you and you know what? It’s all stupid and all lies and I don’t wanna hear your peckerhead horsepiss in here no more.

Guy #1: Well, I fuckin’ read it somewhere about how the company is hirin’ more of them so when you lose your job-

Guy #2: Fuck you, you’re a goddamned idiot, I ain’t losin’ my job, every week you talk about some new way I’m gonna lose my job and I ain’t. Peopl write shit all the time, I could write that you have a big dick and your wife didn’t leave ya but that ain’t true is it?

Guy #1: Well this ain’t about that, this about the blacks and the Mexicans stealin’ our shit, I do my goddamn job and I ain’t gonna let it happen.

Guy #2: The only way it’s gonna happen is from you doin’ your job, and I mean that you don’t fuckin’ do it because you’re a lazy motherfucker. I hope they do hire a Mexican guy to take your place, he’d know how to move more than 3 trailers an hour.

Guy #1: Bullshit, I am better than anyone here.

Guy #2: Yeah, fuckin’ right, they should call you safe auto, cause you got minimum coverage of that fuckin’ lot out there. Now shut the fuck up with your hatin’ bullshit and let me have my hour to eat my fuckin’ sandwich.

This black dude and one of the truckers are talking.

Black guy: I went down to the Social Security office and I was talking to this guy in line and just saying I want to get in there so I can get them to stop sending me the checks and the guy thought I was crazy.

White guy: Yeah, I mean, you can’t take advantage like that. I just wasn’t raised that way.

Black guy: Yep, me neither.

White guy: Yeah you were, you’re black! HAHAHAHAHA!!